I sucked at that.
My Dad could do it really well, being a pilot and all. Most of my family were fish when it came to swimming to the bottom of pools and dirty cricks (creeks for you common folk).
I could never focus on staying under water. I thought it was impending death every single time. Maybe kids who hated me would take it as an opportunity to hold me under or maybe I would just pass out and my life would be over.
This was a good analogy of my past year. I had a rough time focusing so I could eventually come up for air. The idea back then was to take a big enough breath in before going under water but now, I find myself needing the time to exhale for a minute here before doing that. The exhale (the noun) of how cheated I felt, the exhale of the hurt, the exhale of Black Dog nipping. It's a lot like an exorcism and I am watching demons leave the building.
In the middle of the chaos, came a shipment to our door. The story I wrote so long ago, the music Frank and I worked on AGES ago...came packaged as though we didn't even do it. The props that Mark made...it was like it miraculously came together and I imagined each and every single one of you out there in a little factory doing it all as a gift to send to me. I imagined hundreds of names on the 'Sent From' label. It is amazing how people I have never met banded together to make this larger-than-just-music movement come together.
You took my burdens, you carried my weight, you made me believe again.
If you saw how many frustrations I had with other drama and how much time and emotion it stole from the art (not even just me) If you saw how prostituted the music was and how back-burnered this record was...if you saw my anger and tears at the injustice...
Ah, but you DID see. You freaking KNEW. I love you all for it.
Whether you have purchased product, sent me love or encouraged someone you know to get back on the playground, YOU made this happen.
And I love each and every one of you SO much for that!
We WILL defeat depression. We WILL inspire others.
We WILL...because we HAVE to.
Let Passion reign!