I had a really long conversation with a friend online this morning. She (after way too much prodding) listed all the things she would like to do in her life. I think she had given up on them to the point where she couldn't even make her fingers type them. It was like pulling teeth to get it out of her.
"I'd like to visit", "I'd like to see", "I'd like to experience" are all lovely things we would like to have happen to us. It got me thinking though, what would we like to have happen as a result of us?
"But, what would you like to do?" wasn't working with her. "What are YOUR passions?" resulted in, "I don't have any."
I then added, "What are you good at?" to which she replied, "Not much."
And my heart stopped there.
This is the sadness I feel when I speak with most people. I could have taken the parental approach and said, "Oh come on now, there must be something you are good at or you are passionate about!" I think that would be condescending.
Instead I said, "What is stealing your time?" which stimulated a predictable answer; "work."
"And what do you do when you are not working?" which gave me an even more predictable answer; "Eat, watch TV, go online, go to bed."
I asked her if there was something she enjoyed like painting, writing, gardening... and her response was super sad...
"I used to write, but was told that wasn't a real job."
AHHHH! So there it is. She didn't lie to me, she wasn't hiding anything... she had no passion and she honestly didn't think she was good at anything. She like millions of people, have bought into the lie that something is only valuable if another person says so or if it makes money.
Children don't play under that premise. They play because it is FUN.
We take the 'why bother?' approach because we don't see a REASON.
I will give you one; 'cause it FEELS better than sadness.
I make music because it feels good. I make crafts because it feels good. Of course, my greater reason is to inspire others to feel good too.
So, when will you come back to the playground and PLAY?
Your toys are waiting,
Karen
"And they shrieked like 10 banshees and they swung like the Big Top acrobats..." ~Crushing Copper from 'Idiot Savant'
"I'd like to visit", "I'd like to see", "I'd like to experience" are all lovely things we would like to have happen to us. It got me thinking though, what would we like to have happen as a result of us?
"But, what would you like to do?" wasn't working with her. "What are YOUR passions?" resulted in, "I don't have any."
I then added, "What are you good at?" to which she replied, "Not much."
And my heart stopped there.
This is the sadness I feel when I speak with most people. I could have taken the parental approach and said, "Oh come on now, there must be something you are good at or you are passionate about!" I think that would be condescending.
Instead I said, "What is stealing your time?" which stimulated a predictable answer; "work."
"And what do you do when you are not working?" which gave me an even more predictable answer; "Eat, watch TV, go online, go to bed."
I asked her if there was something she enjoyed like painting, writing, gardening... and her response was super sad...
"I used to write, but was told that wasn't a real job."
AHHHH! So there it is. She didn't lie to me, she wasn't hiding anything... she had no passion and she honestly didn't think she was good at anything. She like millions of people, have bought into the lie that something is only valuable if another person says so or if it makes money.
Children don't play under that premise. They play because it is FUN.
We take the 'why bother?' approach because we don't see a REASON.
I will give you one; 'cause it FEELS better than sadness.
I make music because it feels good. I make crafts because it feels good. Of course, my greater reason is to inspire others to feel good too.
So, when will you come back to the playground and PLAY?
Your toys are waiting,
Karen
"And they shrieked like 10 banshees and they swung like the Big Top acrobats..." ~Crushing Copper from 'Idiot Savant'
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